Getting Groceries in a Foreign Land

           Going to the grocery store is always an adventure. I never know which item won’t be in stock, and I never anticipate the confusion that often arises from my lack of Spanish. While I was trying to explain to the chap bagging my groceries that I wanted it all in my backpack, it quickly became apparent that I wasn’t using the right words. After a couple more attempts, he decided I was Italian and said, “capiche” (I get it). The irony of the situation made me smile: I am a quarter Italian, but I don’t speak the language. Nevertheless, “capiche” is one of the few words I have learned from watching gangster roles in movies. I’m glad the word served its purpose while I was at the grocery store.

            I went to the grocery store this morning, and recognized another piece of humor in the experience. Every time I get to the check-out line, I explain the same thing to the bagger- that I want all my groceries in my back-pack. The man is always initially confused, because every normal person just lets him put the groceries in plastic bags. Once the request is understood, it becomes the man’s personal challenge to pack my backpack as full as he possibly can. I always watch with interest to see if the bagger will utilize every pocket in my backpack (there are quite a few), or if he just fills the main pocket and then switches to the plastic bags.

            Today I had to laugh, because the bagger insisted on putting the groceries in plastic bags first, then put them in the backpack. He thought this would be easier, but I’m afraid he baffled himself at the first attempt when he realized he’d packed his first bag in an irregular shape that would not fit properly at the bottom of my backpack. The most amusing moment came at the end- he was determined to fit the last few items into my back-pack, so he held a bunch of bananas, looked for an open pocket, and decided on the worst option- he actually tried to fit 5 bananas into a small side pocket mean for a small water bottle.

            The worst part about going to the grocery store is the check-out line. On a good day, the line is at least 5 carts long, and the cashier seems to take an eternity to get through each set of groceries. I can expect to stand in line for at least 45 minutes. On a busy day, the lines stretch back into the isles, and overlap each other in a convoluted maze of carts and legs. Of course, those are also the days that you happen to be in a line with a change of the guard- your cashier stops midway through the line to switch places with the next cashier, a process which takes a good 20 minutes in itself. Needless to say, going to the grocery store is a trip I make only when I need to. There is no way I would “stop by” the grocery store for any one item, I’d rather go without until I need to buy more things.

            I often think about “Pilgrim’s Progress” while walking home from the grocery store. My back-pack is so full that it sets on my back like the heavy burden that Pilgrim carried. I often wonder what people think of me, walking hunched over with my back-pack and plastic bags of other groceries in my hands. I will be ever more grateful for the convenience and efficiency of stores in the US and a car to tote my groceries in!